L.O.V.E.

So I have been in a relationship for about three months now... A recent record. My usual time limit to know if something is going to work or not is that time right after the first month but not yet the second month... Or the 6 week trial. Regardless my extremely intelligent yet enfuriating partner has made it to three months. Congrats! This blog post is centered, if you have not noticed before, in the things that I have been thinking about, freaking out about and just the general nonsense that goes on in my head when I have time to think.

One of my closest and insightful friends posted a blog about why she was not necesarily excited about getting married and her reasons why. Here it is if you want to check it out http://fishonbikes.blogspot.com/2013/04/why-im-not-excited-to-get-married.html. This and a conversation about marriage with an ex made me think about my own relationship. Yes it has only been three months, but when you know, you know... Although I am usually private about such things I consider it ok to write about this in this space because I do not have tons of readers : ).

Let me get to the point. Recently I have been thinking about that mandatory phrase that commited couples feel the need to say all the time, and to which I may have fallen victim,"I love you." I'm both terified and fascinated by the power that phrase holds, at some point in my life you could never get me to utter those three words. Yet here I am, repeating them to someone.

What I want to do is to stop saying them. You may wonder why, so I will give you my reasons. I'm in a long distance relationship, where I can't really physically express my feelings for my partner. I rely on cute text messages, the ocasional picture and the even more foreign phone call. We say the phrase alot, and honestly I'm a little tired of it. I've had an itch about it. I can't really explain when it started, maybe when I would feel irritated we didn't say them to each other or when we went a week without having a meaningful conversation because we were both so busy. The point is I'm trying to take them out of our rotation.

You know that saying that "your actions speak louder than your words?" That is what I am going for. I don't have to repeat the words every single night, I don't have to rely on these eight letters to express how commited I am to this relationship. All I have to do is show it. The problem is I'm so used to saying them that I have no idea how to prove it. I was using them as a filler, the same way I say umm  and like when I have the need to ramble.

So I'm taking a stand against saying I love you and I will be trying to make my actions speak louder than this overused phrase. This is going to be fun... Please tell me you read the sarcasm dripping from that sentence.

Until next time when my vintage thoughts have nothing to do with my modern mind.  

PS
Sorry Eva for using your great post in my ramblings.